looking out the car window

my summer days would consist mostly of me having to follow my parents around doing their thing: going to the bank, settling payments here and there, ambik lin sekolah, pegi rumah aunty etc. so the usual thing i'd do is be the talkative one to make jokes, cerita balik artikel dalam Solusi, or just plainly intrude conversations orang tua. but those are the times when im a bit perky due to the excessive nescafee consumption during breakfast.  at other time, i'd be doing another thing; looking out the car window.

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i saw an old guy, sitting in front of the front door of his wooden house.
shirtless; maybe due to the heat in the house, staring out at the cars passing by.
i wonder what he's thinking of? is his children home? are they taking good care of him?
or are they all away? is he sick? is he happy? why is he all skinny?
was he thinking of death? is he still able to perform prayers at the mosque?

i saw a guy, maybe in his late 20s.
he wore khaki pants, not fully buttoned old kemeja, and selipar jepun.
he was not all clean, he was walking with a plastic bag in his hand.
i wonder is he a father? it's already night time, so has he just got back from work?
or is he not yet married? then where is he heading? or will he be hanging out at the nearest gerai till midnight?

i saw a makcik, trying to cross the road.
she was wearing a tudung, crossing it over her shoulders. and... berkemban.
i wondered, she must've still been around her neighborhood.
she may think it's too hasty to prep herself up just to cross the road to go to perhaps another family's house?
i wonder if she really doesn't know much about aurat? what her surrounding is like?
how would her children be? do they get proper education? will they study harder at school?
or will they end up being a rempit?

i saw a guy, quite old. maybe around 40s.
but he was so skinny, with long bushy hair. he had earings, and looked messy.
i wondered if he's involved with drugs? i wonder if he has a home?
does he have a family? of course he would. but where are they?
had they given up on him? or if not, how are they living together?

i saw two malay girls on a motorcycle. they were both busy with their phones.
while waiting for the traffic light to turn green.
then a car, with some guys around my age were passing in front of the girls.
and even in that few seconds, the driver was able to give some smooching signs to the girls.
and they were giggling all shy i guess.
i wonder did they like it? the attention that they get from random guys they meet on the streets?

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i like looking out the car window. cause i get to see a lot of things. i get to see many kinds of people. judgmental i might be, but it's kind of thrilling to wonder how the lives are behind these people i see. and definitely, it helps me think deeper.

but behind the thrills and the thoughts, i cant help but feel tired inside. thinking of where these people and i myself might end up in. one or the other remember? there are so much differences between all of us, and all will be weighed differently; according to how much we knew, how much we understood, and how much we had done.

but we all know that Allah is Just. and it's us who are ignorant and self-centered. most of the time.

"These are the Signs of Allah: We rehearse them to thee in Truth:

and Allah means no injustice to any of His creatures."

 [3:108]

 wallahua'lam.

yours truly,

one who's weak. most of the time.