living up to it

*ugh..tade harapan nak dapat baby comel mcm ni..*

It brought a smile on my face as i realized that my parents had come up with a name for me, accordingly to how Rasulullah SAW himself describes us, Hawa; 

"Dunia ini adalah perhiasan, 

dan sebaik-baik perhiasan adalah wanita solehah" 

(HR Muslim)

and today i am the proud owner of a short and simple name, with a very big meaning behind it. my name is Izyan. which means perhiasan. And yet very deep in my heart there's a slight uneasiness, as i wonder am i nowhere near the definition of my own name? does having a name with the meaning makes me anywhere close to the one that Rasulullah SAW defines? of course NO, yan..=(

Most us girls knew this hadith by heart (still not able to use women instead of girls. still in denial that im approaching 21 maybe *wink*) Well, even if some don't actually know that it's a hadith, they would surely heard it from someone somewhere. But when mentioning the word perhiasan, does everybody knows how it is defined? Rasulullah didn't say "sebaik-baik perhiasan adalah wanita" but he said "wanita solehah". A small addition but with a big distinction.

For he knows that we might agree to the statement, that wanita adalah perhiasan dunia. Generally having a soothing effect on everybody around them, i.e our mothers, our grandmas etc. But there are those too who would think of the statement as; being cantik, hot, super-skinny, fair-skinned, cun are what makes women the dunia's ornament. 

How wrong we are. For being one, there's a lot of things you need to be, before you can even be considered as one. By who? definitely not by the people around you. But by our Creator, our Al-Khaaliq, our Al-Musawwir. For i believe that people can judge you as one or not, by relatively comparing us to the listed keperibadian: taat kepada Allah & RasulNya, berdiam di rumah, tidak bertabarruj, menjaga anggota tubuhnya dari berbuat maksiat, taat kepada suami dan bertanggung jawab sebagai anak, isteri dan ibu; menjaga amalan-amalan sunnah, bersikap qanaah, penyabar, menjadi penerang bagi wanita lain; and the list goes on. But only Allah Knows whether you are one or not.

To me, judging and knowing are two different things. All of those criteria are what makes one a wanita solehah, but those are more on how others perceive you aint it? not to say that you dont need to fit into all those criteria, mind you, they are vital. But i think, at the end of the day, what matters most is how Allah sees you, coz only He Knows who we are truthfully. 

i've read the list over and over again, and with every word i am feeling insignificant and reduced to a size of my pinky finger right now, seeing how far i am from all those criteria. BUT!! whatever. i may be reduced to a size of a pulp, but it won't dampen my spirit. 

I'm gonna try and be one. 

even if i cant, well at least  let me die trying.

ps: not having a name with the meaning of perhiasan doesnt mean you cant try to be one too. (",)

note to self:

my name is izyan

which means perhiasan

and im gonna live up to it

insyaAllah