Redha

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ

Redha; 

means to wholeheartedly accept whatever decisions that Allah s.w.t. has decided upon us. 

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I was busying myself with treating Che (grandmom)'s foot that night. And by treating i meant those really simple stuff actually: removing bits here and there, cleaning the skin, rubbing it till it bleeds a bit, pressing the skin, applying antibiotic creams, putting on gauze etc. She has diabetic foot ulcer. Anyway, the TV was switched on in the background, which i was not really paying much attention to. But i caught on some words now and then. I think it was probably a show similar to 'Bersamamu' or something, where they show stories of those who are less fortunate than us. So at that time, it was a story of a single mother, trying to raise her kids who are handicapped. Two of them are mentally and physically handicapped if i'm not mistaken, and the youngest was the only one who went to school. The little one herself suffers from depression. And then I lifted my head to watch a few seconds worth of footage when they interviewed the mother. She looked close to 60:

"Makcik redha hidup macam ni sebab ini yang Tuhan tentukan."

(I accept this life as it is, as this is Allah's will)

and i silently continued wrapping Che's foot, with a new-formed tug in the heart.

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My parents went to visit a recently orphaned siblings. Eight of them. They were all still in school, the eldest being 16. Their dad died a few years back, and now the mother died recently. From an accident. Their step-dad couldn't afford to support all of them, but he did take the two youngest children with him. He does come by and visit the step-children now and then, since the mother passed away. So the 6 are left living with their old grandparents. The house looked okay, Alhamdulillah, but it was inevitably pretty empty. Mama took some photos with them, and i see these beautiful faces smiling back. Genuine smiles, together with their grandparents. 

Redha.

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My little sister has this cute gang of her back in highschool. I knew all of them, though i haven't had the chance to meet them as much as i wanted to. My parents knew their parents. The girls even cried when they all have to go their separate ways for college. The furthest one is currently in USA. She's so smart that she gets to study abroad way earlier than the others. And last night, her mother died. Innalillahi wainna ilaihi raajiuun. Apparently her mother had been sick for over a month now, and she was actually planning on coming back to Malaysia this December. But things happened too fast. Listening to what she went through while her mother was sick, broke my heart to million pieces. She texted my little sister this morning:

"My mom died. Can you tell the others?"

She just turned 18 this year. She is the eldest daughter in her family, 

with nine younger ones trailing behind her.

Redha.

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"Aku redha dengan ketentuanMu."

They are words that i often utter whenever i feel life is a tad bit difficult for me. Whenever i feel like things are not going my way. Whenever there are turns of events that i didn't expect. But these stories, made me feel so ashamed of myself. Of how different my 'redha' is, as compared to theirs. Of how easily those words slipped from my mouth, when i'm not yet even tested.

Their 'redha' requires a whole lot more: patience, will, strength, and perhaps things that i could never imagined. I can never, ever understand how does it feel like to be in their shoes. But I can only offer them prayers, that with their 'redha', Allah s.w.t will grant them with so much more, if not here in this world, then most certainly in the Hereafter. 

May Allah ease everyone's sufferings and burdens.

May Allah guide our hearts and mind, in times that we needed Him most.

Dan semoga Allah Redha, terhadap hamba-hambaNya yang redha dengan ketentuanNya.

Al-fatihah.

ps: To my little sister in USA, i wish i can give you a warm hug now. 

But do'a is what i can send you for now. :'(

وَلَنَبْلُوَنَّكُم بِشَيْءٍ مِّنَ الْخَوْفِ وَالْجُوعِ وَنَقْصٍ مِّنَ الْأَمْوَالِ وَالْأَنفُسِ وَالثَّمَرَاتِ وَبَشِّرِ الصَّابِرِينَ

الَّذِينَ إِذَا أَصَابَتْهُم مُّصِيبَةٌ قَالُوا إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ

أُولَٰئِكَ عَلَيْهِمْ صَلَوَاتٌ مِّن رَّبِّهِمْ وَرَحْمَةٌ وَأُولَٰئِكَ هُمُ الْمُهْتَدُونَ

"Dan sungguh akan Kami berikan cobaan kepadamu, 

dengan sedikit ketakutan, kelaparan, kekurangan harta, jiwa dan buah-buahan. 

Dan berikanlah berita gembira kepada orang-orang yang sabar. 

(yaitu) orang-orang yang apabila ditimpa musibah, mereka mengucapkan: 

"Inna lillaahi wa innaa ilaihi raaji'uun". 

Mereka itulah yang mendapat keberkatan yang sempurna dan rahmat 
dari Tuhan mereka dan mereka itulah orang-orang yang mendapat petunjuk. "

[2:155-157]