being international

intro: as quoted from a friend of mine, my life seems to be filled with "eh,boleh share dalam blog" moments, but time is something that i don't have. and words, are things that don't come easily. what i share in my blog -most, if not all- are things that really provoked me..how i think, what i feel etc. thus, a new post is definitely not easy, even though i have so much to talk about. : (

my post this time. international night.

so i went to one. organized in RCSI. i went there;

1. simply because a dear friend of mine will be a part of the group performing for Malaysia. 

2. since it is her birthday. i feel the sudden urge to be there with her.

3. because i want to meet friends who i miss so so much.

after maghrib prayers, we head there. ive never been to one, so i didnt exactly think much about how it will be. as we took our seats, a friend whispered to me "yan. actually this whole event ni macam ade issue sikit. ramai orang oppose." ookayy. i look behind, there is a bar with people drinking. i look left and right, guys and girls mixing, exposed skin here and there, glasses of beer in their hands; saw some Malays with their friends. some holding hands, some hugging each other etc.

right. i guess i do understand why people wouldn't want to be there. i think back, if i know this, would i come? most probably no. but i AM here. i cant just run off can i? 

but then, i look beside me. i saw close friends of mine, who i know for a fact are not party-people or those who would go crazy-bersukasuki-tak-ingat-dunia-nak-have-fun in places like this. mind you, some of them are people who handle usrah back in KMB. but they ARE there. and then i saw my friend, who seems very nervous having to perform as a representative for Malaysia. i wonder why THEY are all there, even though they all KNEW that people are opposing those who attend this event.

what happened that night? in short; the whole performance given by the RCSIans was perfect. menyebabkan sy yg baru balik from Malaysia semakin semangat berkobar-kobar. ever heard of the term "bangga menjadi anak Malaysia"? well, their performance did just that. a big round of applause for you guys involved. having to practice for the whole 2 weeks, having to manage your time for studies and card-signing what-not; you guys deserved to win the whole thing. but of course, winning the prize isn't everything. winning the heart of the audience is more like it.

Anyway, back to my point of this whole post. at the end of the whole thing, i think there is nothing wrong with this kind of event. they were just representing a part of our culture. But my friends seems to be scared to admit that they are representing malaysia for that night. kenapa rasa bersalah? you're not doing anything wrong. if you guys don't represent, who else will? sedangkan 3 years back you Malaysians had been winning. i know it IS a trivial issue; showing off Malaysia's culture je pun. But after seeing all the performance from other countries, i think it's an eye-opener for everybody. How our culture is still very much modest, and how creepy other cultures are. specifically the last performance. i never thought there is a culture who promotes s****y dance by their women. *sorry for my bluntness. there's no other word to describe their performace except: slutty. isk. mintak2 tade geng diorang bace nih*

so, dont feel guilty. UNLESS, you want to perform because you want guys to notice you. UNLESS, you want to have fun that night sampai tak ingat dunia. UNLESS, you skipped waktu solat just to practice for the performance. UNLESS, you touch bukan mahram while you were performing. UNLESS, you went there to watch all the sexy dance by other cultures; belly dancing, erotic dancing what not. UNLESS, you went there so that you can be hugging your guy since there will definitely be no naqib or naqibah watching you there. UNLESS, you're doing things that you know is haram. 

but from what i recall, my friends were covering their eyes when the s****y dances start. istighfar is what we kept on reciting whenever we saw girls in sexy clothings; whenever the sexy dances starts off; whenever we were moving in between the drunken guys. 

as for me, i gained a lot that night. 

1. i realized how scary and deviated other cultures are nowadays, and i am thankful with mine, even though it is still not even close enough to be called a 'negara islam'. 

2. i realized that many people think that they can do whatever they want, since there is no one watching them, yet they forgot the angels accompanying them, writing down every single thing that they're doing, and how Allah is watching them instead *this goes out for the fellow malay-muslim that night*. 

3. i realized that no matter how scary the places you go too, and you feel suffocated at times, and worried about your level of iman; as long as you still end up praying for His protection, then you are still safe, because He is still there for you to think of. -no matter how slutty the dances are in front of you.heheh.- 

so my point in this very long post of mine is; i wont be judgmental to these kind of events. as long as niat is betul, all is well. i think. 

but of course, prevention is better too. if you think you cant handle your iman in these kind of events, tak perlu attend. *er.not to say that i can handle mine. balik tu banyak kene solat taubat kot. tercemar kesucian mataku. huhu*

wallahua'lam.

ps: this is just an opinion. i might be wrong. but we all have different ways of thinking. dont we? but lets just pray it is always to be better for Him. insyaAllah. 

pps: really sorry for the repetitive S words. sangat tak elok, i know. *isk*