cepat bosan

they get bored easily.

im a human. 
i get bored easily.

with the songs i listen to. with my blog layout. with many many things. but life? no. no one should be bored with life. cuz if you are, you still haven't figured out the purpose of life. and when you do, you'll realize that you're way behind in this race.  (sad)

subhanallah. Guide us, ya Allah.

alright. done with blog. nerd mode starts now. :)

ps: cuz studying is one of the many ways to fulfill that purpose. insyaAllah. 


pen and paper

if you were to take a piece of paper and a pen..
and you were asked to write down
the ultimate thing that you wish for
what would it be?


if we didn't wrote down;

redha Allah..
or syurga Allah..
or kasih sayang Allah...
or anything that involves Our Creator..

then i believe that we should really rethink 
of what we're doing here in this world,
and why.

shouldn't be too hard.
for it's already stated in the Holy Quran.

"Aku tidak menciptakan jin dan manusia,
melainkan agar mereka beribadah kepada-Ku"

"Dan (ingatlah) ketika Tuhan-mu Berfirman kepada para malaikat, 
"Aku hendak menjadikan khalifah
di bumi."



one moment..

one moment, you're with friends reciting the Quran. or done with jemaah prayers. or reading Solusi or Riyadhus Solihin that your parents gave you. or got a very sweet message from your fellow friend wishing you 'selamat berbuka'. or friends reminding you of Him over and over again. or checking out facebook, seeing hadiths on people's status here and there. or checking out cool blogs about how they see the world through kaca mata Islam. and there you are, feeling blissful and content, thanking Him for all these great things HE gives you and Showed you.

the next moment, you bumped into a video. showing an extravagant wedding with people in awe of it, instead of being reminded of a verse from the Quran, [17:27]

Verily spendthrifts are brothers of the Evil Ones; and the Evil One is to his Lord (Himself) ungrateful.

or having bumped into an 'exclusive' malaysian videoclip, very much similar to those in Hollywood. and then finding comments like this, attached to it: 

"All this talks about 'Muslim syarak' , 'x tutup aurat', bla bla bla is humiliating Islam and Malaysia. Dalam video clip ni gua tengok dier pakai baju cam biasa, cam org jln2 gi klua.. Pastu dier main torchlight jadi mcm guard. Rilek ler... itu pun nak kecoh. Lain le kalau di separuh bogel pastu gi romen ngan dak c***y 2, baru le gua naik angin. Lirik pun dia pun cam baik jer...die cakap i like 2 play bukan i like 2 f**k u.... Apadaa... memalukan org mlayu jerr."

and there's people hitting the 'like' button for this comment too. and that's when you realized, you're not in a fairytale. so many things still undone. so many things you'll still have to answer to once you meet Him.

a reminder from a sister caught me this week: 
Jahiliyah tu, semakin organized dan maju everyday. 

so let us pray we wont fall for it, even one bit. 


idul Fitr; more than a day of celebration?

funny aint it?
at 20, and im just barely understanding the true meaning of 'idul Fitr'.
kembali kepada fitrah
is it because of my ignorance?
that only now im trying to understand this special day.
or should i blame my family or my surroundings instead?

truth is, pointing fingers leads me to nowhere.
instead i should be thankful, 
that at 20,
Allah gave this chance for me to think.
instead of 30. 
instead of 40. 
instead of never.

one fateful day, 
it was from a radio show, 
an ustaz started his talk with defining the words of 'idul Fitr'.
i wasn't able to listen to the whole show,
cant remember why.
but the definition was stuck in my tiny brain.
'seriously, ive never thought of that.'

the last few days,
i've been so occupied by this.
kembali kepada fitrah.
so the day is supposed to be a 'celebration' of that.
but the question is, have i?
kembali kepada fitrah.
did i use all the chances Ramadhan has to offer?
untuk kembali kepada fitrah?

this Ramadhan...
have i struggled and prepared myself for Lailatul Qadr,
instead of just waiting for it?
have i finished reciting Quran,
just because it's something i do every Ramadhan,
instead of hoping that Allah makes the bond with this Holy Quran stronger?
Have i performed tarawikh,
just because it's embarrassing not to do so,
instead of realizing that this solat sunat 
is only done specifically and specially in this holy month?
Have i eaten for sahur everyday,
just to fill my empty tummy, 
instead of understanding the barakah behind it?
Have i woken up for Qiam,
just because i had extra time before sahur,
instead of really having faith in Allah's words,
that Qiam really strengthens your iman?

have i...have i.. have you yan?
i kept questioning myself over and over again.

kembali kepada fitrah.
how i wish i am there.
how i wish i'd managed to do the most i can,
in this Holy month of Ramadhan.
how i wish, that im eligible to celebrate Idul Fitr,
with it's true meaning.

still, it's a happy occasion that one should cherish 
and be thankful for.
we're back in the real game now.
if we managed to tame our hawa nafsu,
then insyaAllah we'll manage to fight off all the Red Army,
for the next 11 months.

alright. this is just me retrospecting in public.
edisi ke berapa tak pasti.
whatever it is, 
saya nak minta maaf,
to all my friends and fellow readers.
for any words that might have hurt you.
im a mere human being, bound to make mistakes.
im here just to write and share my insignificant experiences.
with the hope that they may benefit those who willingly visit this blog.

and as for now, we still have a few hours of Ramadhan left.
(some still have a day left)
i've heard of a quote somewhere:
"jangan Syawalkan akhir Ramadhan"
for all we know, all the offers stand still.
the Red Army are still tied, 
the Doors of Heaven are still opened,
the barakah is still there.

let's just grab whatever we can.
while Allah is giving the chance.
and pray that, on that fateful Idul Fitr,
we are in the groups of people who had;
"kembali kepada fitrah"

Salam Aidilfitri
Maaf Zahir & Batin.
i mean it.
mintak maaaaaaf sgt2 eit? ;)


and so today i went to KB Mall with abe. for the 2nd time in this 3months-long holiday. (yes, that's how rare i went out. i do go out, following mama and abah around, only to be in the backseat playing my part as the entertainer and pentazkirah.haha)

anyways, yes. the best brother in the whole wild world (hehe) came back yesterday. he didnt plan on surprising anybody like he did a few weeks back, since he wanted to come back so much. yup, this year would be abe's longest raya-holiday. me, *ehem2* being the partial reason. (da nak balik Dublin on 3rd day of raya). huhu. however, us (abah mama and lin) managed to suprise him with Che Putih instead. took every ounce of our acting talent to fool him at first. it worked! 

ok. back to story. so i went out with abe to buy myself my very own external hard-disc. i dont trust myself buying it alone, cuz i might just end up with a green one. so i need abe since he'll definitely know better. so the whole time all i did was pick the prettiest one, and abe would ask the right questions to the sales-guy consisting of words like "warranty..dale..luar..." all things i dont comprehend. even with abe just now, i still managed to buy myself a white-green mouse. (hehe)

ok. now im really going to the point of the story. so i was walking with abe, and abe being himself, a very protective brother does things that he always does; waiting up for me to buy other things i want, paying for some of them too (ATM ramai orang. will pay back if ingat.heheh), gosok-gosok kepala asking what else i want and etc; yes. he's very much like abah. so this is when my mata caught some mata-mata. first, falling on me, then straight away will continue towards abe, and will go back-and-forth. so i was a bit uneasy. in a sense, that i might send the wrong message towards them. 

for one; budaya couple is something that really needs to be stopped.

so i was uneasy. perasan sendiri? mungkin. up till i met my aunty and cousins along the way. i stopped by. salam-salam. and they were like. "la yan ngan nan ke? macam girlfriend boyfriend doh tengok tadi". see. told you so.

but as i continued walking with abe,  i realized that these are all just people. i shouldn't be worrying at all of what others might think. for what matters most would be the Eye. (no, not the one in LOTR) but the Eyes of our Creator right? He's the one who's always Watching. and i should be worrying about what He is Seeing instead. at KB Mall or not. and for all i know, i was happily tagging along my beloved abe. halal jer~

still, i ended up lowering my gaze so not to meet any mata-mata. perasan sendiri pun tak elok jugak. ;) 

*in Madinah last year. went inside a shop and abe found
a chocolate box with his name. tapi balik2 kotak pecah.kesian*

"Verily, Allâh knows the unseen of the heavens and the earth.
 And Allâh is the All-Seer of what you do."



to fellow readers

im not exactly sure why im writing this. 
but to a certain extent i think i need to explain myself.wuwu. 
so this morning my sister called me (very early)
saying that one of the pictures i posted in my blog 'changed'
in one of the previous post
she kindly and hectically wanted my password and all
cuz she didnt want me to delete it myself
since she didnt even want me to even look at the picture.
so to anyone who HAD come across with it,
im really sorry if this blog indirectly dah kotorkan pandangan mata anda.
from what i can guess, it's not a good picture to look at.
huhu... my mistake, since i just copied the image URL randomly..
so do understand that it's got NOTHING to do with me. 
ill try and be more careful with the pictures i copied.
no more copying URL for me.
my mistake too for not even acknowledging the source.

ps: web. it's definitely a scary world out there. (sob2)

sorry  :(


something so good...

doesn't necessarily looks good.

"berhati-hatilah menjaga Hati, 
kerana disitulah jatuhnya 
pandangan Ilahi"
-seorang ustaz berkata-kata dalam radio-
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